Behaviour, Not Addiction
The Sex Addiction Myth

Sex Addiction: The Overused Excuse - Why the Label Doesn’t Fit Here

1. The Problem with the “Sex Addiction” Label

• Not Clinically Recognized: “Sex addiction” is not recognized as a clinical diagnosis by the DSM-5 (the primary manual for mental health disorders).

• Frequently Misapplied: The label is often used to avoid accountability for repeated, harmful, or boundary-violating behaviour, especially by men.

• Marketing and Profit: Many therapy programs and rehab centers market this diagnosis for financial gain, not clarity or genuine recovery.

• Compulsion vs. Addiction: While behavioural compulsions exist (like gambling disorder), not every repeated sexual boundary violation is addiction. Overuse of the term undermines real cases and lets individuals off the hook for their choices.

2. Why “Addiction” Doesn’t Describe This Pattern

• Addiction Requires Loss of Control: Genuine addiction involves repeated, failed attempts to stop, significant distress, and withdrawal.

• What’s Actually Happening Here:

  • There is planning, rationalization, secrecy, and preparation.

  • Behaviours are not impulsive, but deliberate and concealed.

  • No evidence of physical withdrawal or uncontrollable urges, but repeated, intentional choices.

• Self-Diagnosis for Self-Protection: “Addiction” is cited only when consequences arise, as a shield against responsibility.

3. Cam’s Documented Behaviours (as Observed and Reported)

• Online Searching & Surveillance: Repeatedly searches for and views women’s profiles, photos, and videos across multiple platforms, including those of acquaintances, coworkers, and friends-of-friends.

• Image Collection: Maintains digital folders with large numbers of images of women and girls.

• Obsessive Fantasizing: Describes, in his disclosures, how he fixates on particular individuals (e.g., a receptionist), allows attraction to grow, and spends days in obsessive romantic and sexual fantasy.

• Masturbation & Repetition: Admits to repeatedly masturbating to these fantasies, even after stating intentions to stop.

• Boundary Crossing: Initiates or maintains secret contact with women outside the relationship, sometimes violating boundaries he previously agreed to.

• Concealed Attraction to Minors: Reports and evidence include images of underage individuals (some family members), with delayed or incomplete disclosure.

• Ignoring Consequences: Continues exposing himself to known triggers and opportunities for acting out, despite awareness of harm and repeated discussions.

• Minimizing and Rationalizing: Regularly claims insight, “doing the work,” or being “further along” than others, but the pattern persists.

• Performative Recovery: Participates in recovery activities (stepwork, therapy) as appearances, not as meaningful change. Admissions and apologies are used to manage image rather than transform behaviour.

• Manipulative Dynamics: The pattern is supported by chronic secrecy, shifting blame, and controlling how he is perceived (integrity abuse disorder).

• Proximity to Vulnerable Individuals: Continues these behaviours while living near an elementary school, increasing concern for community safety.

All statements above are based on documented communications, observed behaviours, and direct admissions. They are included here for public awareness and community safety, not as definitive legal or clinical diagnosis.

4. Why This Isn’t “Addiction” - and Why the Label Is Harmful

• Deliberate, Not Compulsive: The described actions are planned and maintained in secrecy, not driven by uncontrollable compulsion.

• Help Sought Only When Caught: “Recovery” and acknowledgment happen primarily when faced with exposure or consequences, not from a genuine drive to change.

• Excuse, Not Explanation: Labeling these patterns as “addiction” is often used to shift blame and keep others emotionally invested or confused.

• Real Impact on Others: Overusing “sex addiction” minimizes the damage done to partners, coworkers, and community.

5. If You’re Still Not Sure

Ask yourself:

• Has real change ever followed Cam’s apologies, or do the same patterns keep repeating? What proof do you have?

• Are those who’ve been harmed genuinely heard, or are they dismissed as “reactive” or “unforgiving”?

• Are these actions accidental, or do they reflect conscious, repeated choices?

Consider these further questions:

• When was the last time Cam sexualized a woman, online or offline?

• When was the last time he engaged in sexual or romantic fantasies about someone outside his relationship?

• When was the last time he sought out a woman or girl, online or in person, outside clear consent?

• What concrete steps - beyond acknowledgment or sharing with support groups - has he taken to prevent these behaviours?

• Does he understand why he engages in these patterns? What deeper needs, conflicts, or unresolved issues might be driving them?

• What is he actually doing to address root causes - not just symptoms - of this behaviour?

If these questions can’t be answered with real clarity, honesty, and evidence of change, ask yourself who actually benefits from keeping the “addiction” story alive.

This isn’t about illness. It’s about a sustained pattern of harm and refusal to take responsibility.

If you have concerns or need documentation to support your own safety, contact me directly. This page exists for public awareness and protection only. All content is based on direct evidence and presented to the best of my knowledge.

For Former Partners and Coworkers

If you’re still unconvinced, or you believe your experience gives you unique insight into his character, ask yourself:

• Were you really paying attention to the signs, or was it easier to ignore the red flags?

• Did you ever question the inconsistencies, or did you choose the version of him that fit your own story?

• Is it possible what you took as love or special attention was just a temporary role - until you were no longer useful or convenient for him?

Consider also:

• Is it typical or healthy to be obsessively active on dating apps - saving photos, screenshots, and sharing private conversations or details about dates with acquaintances?

• Is it normal for someone to move on immediately to a new woman the next day after a breakup, or to have multiple romantic or sexual connections “in play” at the same time?

• Does it seem reasonable that at every workplace, he developed “friends with benefits” or sexual connections?

• When did any of this start to look like standard dating, and when did it cross the line into a pattern of using, collecting, or discarding people?

These are not just quirks or harmless habits. If this behaviour is being treated as normal by you or people around him, it’s worth asking:

• Who does this actually serve, and what are you excusing in the process?

You might believe you knew the “real” Cam. But understanding the truth means asking hard questions, holding him accountable, and looking past what you want to believe.

Denying what’s in front of you serves no one but Cam. That’s how the cycle continues.